Waiting with gratitude

(Written yesterday)
Waiting and waiting. This morning I awoke bright and early at 5:45 to shower and get myself out of the house by 6:20 so that I could make it to Columbia by 7:30. The idea was to get there when they first started seeing patients so that I didn't have to wait, but I waited for blood work, waited again for a doctor to come in and do an ultrasound, and then waited again for a nurse to give me a prescription. But I still made it just on time for work, rolling in the door at 9:00.

And here it is 9:15 pm, and I'm still going strong and feeling excited about starting this next round. I know statistically speaking it's probably going to take us at least 6 months to conceive, but emotions aren't something we can control. I feel a little giddy and think that this time could be the big surprise. It could be that YES moment, even though logically I know I don't want to be tooooooo hopeful.

Tonight I attended my friend Booker's yoga for Changemakers session, which was heart-centered and focused on compassion. I met the most amazing man there named Ash Faith, and I had the honor of being his partner as we shared during the session. I learned that 4 years ago on June 5th he was in a car accident that left him in a 2-month coma and with a traumatic brain injury. As we moved through the practice I could see him struggle. I felt him next to me as he fell over again and again, and when we did a partner balancing exercise, we held each other up and kept one another from falling. In the end we shared about the following quote, "When you can move through your discomfort, I can move out of my pain and we can meet somewhere in the middle."  He shared that he is still in the process of forgiveness and that the last 4 years have been an incredible process of healing and recovery. He is in the midst of writing 4 books, and he publicly speaks to people about his experience. To see someone struggle and fight and stay focused and be extraordinary is awe-inspiring.

So, as I sit on the train this morning, I reflect on my gratitude for life. Life as precious. Life as fragile. Life as joyous beyond measure. And I look forward to bringing a new life into this world.